When you build a strong foundation to your love relationship, it can withstand the most turbulent of storms that come your way. How to build a strong foundation? Find effective strategies of working through conflict (amongst other things). Here are 4 rules to live by:
- Choose to not let things slide.
There’s a difference between letting things slide and picking your battles.
When you find yourself saying, “I can handle it, it’s not that big of a deal.” Or thinking that things will work itself out. Also ask yourself whether or not you’re picking your battles wisely…or if you are just letting things slide…
If you’re letting things slide, it’s passive. It’s avoidance if you find yourself feeling like it’s too much work to have to talk through or deal with it.
It will wear and tear a relationship apart.
Face the conflict.
2. Own up to your part.
Chances are, you’re in a relationship with someone other than yourself. That means you’re a team. Do your part and share the responsibility.
If you think the other person is the only one doing everything wrong, then there’s something deeper going on there.
If the issue is annoying that much, then it’s too important to be shrugged off. Look within yourself first- there’s always room for growth. And then find time to call a meeting, to calmly discuss, brainstorm options and collaborate on some decision.
3. Create a safe space to connect.
Want a healthy relationship? Don’t allow conflicts to fester and create plaque buildup. The arteries of your relationship will become clogged and put it at risk of a heart attack or stroke.
When one of you become hostile in conflict, you throw the trust and safety out the window. Choose a time you are both able to to create that safe space for each other, so that effective communication can take place.
4. Nurture your commitment and create positive moments.
Knowing you can count on each other to help and support, no matter what, is important when you’re committed to one another and to the relationship.
Conflicts and miscommunications are normal. They may be difficult at times, but positives grow and nurture a healthy relationship.
Create new memories- positive and fun ones. Make date night/date days be a celebration of your love. Bring the fun, the passion, the intimacy.
…Remember, you’re a team. Successful and winning teams work together towards a common goal. They focus on the positive, and also know how to work through the bad.
What would it look like if you’re able to find effective strategies for working through your conflicts?